how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
