How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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