dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
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I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
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Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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