There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
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It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.