Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I need water and some morals
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Randomize
