i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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