i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
