i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
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no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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