I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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