Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize