He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
