seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
being pregnant is like rehab
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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