His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
