Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I am naked and annoyed.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize