Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
