Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
