hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize