Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
two words...techno handjob
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
