Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Randomize
