giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
