sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
We need a shit load of segways right now
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
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