yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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