She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize