this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
