Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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