You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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