Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize