i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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