he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
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Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
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Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
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