Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
