If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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