one two three fourrrrnication!
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry