Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
