I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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