big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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