Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
bring money and cleavage
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Randomize
