Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
