he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
