dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.