We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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