all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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