meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
