did you get engaged???
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just want nice things and good sex
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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