Nicole vs. Life
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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