By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
