I heard we made out
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
