Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
