So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
