Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize