Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
