shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Randomize
